Resistance♥

Tuesday, June 30, 2009

When am I going to forget him????
I really feeling very 痛苦 now!!!!
I started to lose tamper in front of my friends
Not jus friends but also my aunt
I really hate myself a lot
How can I do tis to my friends and family members?
Tis few days I started to have nightmares
and even sleep less den 6hrs
Which is not normal for mi?
Wht am I going to do?
I kne forgeeting TianHuar is
the matter of time
and hard work tht I put in
But when is he going to get out of my world???

I really feel very regret of going
Chris there work before
If at first I nv go dere work
Den I will not knw who is TianHuar,Aloy,doreen and etc...
TianHuar and doreen I really nothing to sae le

♥our day is full of surprise

12:12:00 PM

Sunday, June 28, 2009

Jus finish watching 败犬女王
It was a happy ending at least they were together
even though they nv get married
And it is the ending tht I like
While I watching tis drama
My teas suddenly drop down
I jus don knw why

Ytd night
My mind suddenly feel very annoying
coz of 2 problems
One of the problem is TianHuar
and tht I got nothing to sae
coz is the matter of time

But another one is my friendship
I really feel very happy when I was with
Selene and Yvonne
But the problem lay on mi when I was with them
Sometime I really feel like keeping my mouth shut
When I was with them
Coz some of the topics they talk
I can't join in
Sometimes when they talk abt someone
I also can't join in the topic
coz I donno the person they are talking
Take example: last fri
We were meeting at KFC
Yvonne and Selene
were having singing class at evening
So they whole afternoon
they were practice for there singing
I was trying to give some feedback
and
give some ways to prevent them from getting nervous
But I think I sae something wrong
And I and Yvonne end up quarreling
and
I even throw my tamper
Not becoz of what Yvonne had did
But I was angry abt myself
Why can't I control my tamper ?
Why can't I let my mind stop think
abt Tianhuar When I was with my frez?
But no one will trust mi when I tell her the reason?
So jus though tht I was angry with her?
Jus like before Selene join us
I and Yvonne talk abt the taiwan Drama
But Yvonne found it very boring
I jus want to find something to talk abt
but end up I picking the wrong topic

Sometime I really try my very best to join in their topic
But I always the one tht being "left out"
The problem lay on mi and not them
Coz I always can't join them for outing
Jus for one reason
I was grounded!!!
They also try their best to chat
abt some topics tht I know
But I jus feel tht I have no confident in myself
Not coz of the topics
But coz of mi
I jus feel very scared tht I will lost them again
I don knw they will saw tis post or not
But I jus hope they nv saw it
Coz of some reasons

♥our day is full of surprise

12:30:00 PM

Saturday, June 27, 2009

温岚 - 傻瓜

其实他做的坏事我们都懂
没有什么不同
眼光闪烁暧昧流动
闭上眼当作听说

其实别人的招数我们都懂
没有什么不同
故作软弱撒娇害羞
只是有一点别扭

傻瓜也许单纯地懂
爱得没那么做作
爱上了我不保留

傻瓜我们都一样
被爱情伤了又伤
相信这个他不一样
却又再一次受伤

傻瓜我们都一样
受了伤却不投降
相信付出会有代价
代价只是一句傻瓜

其实别人的招数我们都懂
没有什么不同
故作软弱撒娇害羞
只是有一点别扭

傻瓜也许单纯地懂
爱得没那么做作
爱上了我不保留

傻瓜我们都一样
被爱情伤了又伤
相信这个他不一样
却又再一次受伤

傻瓜我们都一样
受了伤却不投降
相信付出会有代价
代价只是一句傻瓜

傻瓜我们都一样
被爱情伤了又伤
相信这个他不一样
却又再一次受伤

傻瓜我们都一样
受了伤却不投降
相信付出会有代价
代价只是一句傻瓜

♥our day is full of surprise

12:00:00 PM

Friday, June 26, 2009

I just don knw why
recently my mood keep on swinging
Taking example the day before
I was moody the whole day
even my friends were angry of the things tht I doing
Ytd afternoon
My mood was ok and when it comes to night
I suddenly become moody...
It is because tht I got nothing to do
tht why my mind jus think of TianHuar???
I jus donno why!!!!

It true tht I really MISS him
I got a lot of qns wanted to ask him
(ex:How have u been doing,Hows ur study and etc)
But what can I do???!!!
Every times when I msn online
always saw him online like nobody business
And
the only things I can do
was
to control myself from chatting with him

I got once had a EVIL 恋头
Tht is if he and his gal friend break
Maybe I will stand a chance
But aft a while
My mind told mi tht
even he and his gal friend break
I also won't stand a chance de!
Jus coz of one reason
"No one will come save mi
no matter how deeply tht my heart hurt
so what the point of letting my heart hurt once more???"

Now I started to feel tht
I starting to build a wall around my heart
Coz I don want to let my heart to hurt again
Maybe this is the only way to prevent mi from hurting
and
我不会再让我自己为任何个男孩流泪!!!
I knw tht I already break tis promise tht I make to myself
on the day before and ytd
But I will walk toward tht
Coz tis is one of my goals as well
In order to become a strong woman
I cant let myself to cry for a guy tht does not worth it!!!

To Yvonne:Gal I so sorry for throw tamper at you
But I was not angry at what u do
But I was angry with myslf for throw tamper at u
It true tht U have the rite to angry at mi
But hope u will forgive!
;<

♥our day is full of surprise

12:44:00 PM

Thursday, June 25, 2009

Today went to CWP to watch
"Transformers revenge of the fallen"
By rite we want to watch the movie
at 4pm de
But the ticket sold out
So we had no choice but to watch 5pm
Anyway the movie I have one word to discrible
tht is
"COOL"

♥our day is full of surprise

8:29:00 PM

Wednesday, June 24, 2009

Jus feel like blogging
I don knw why my heart still feel very sad
I wish tht my holiday would come to an end
So tht
I will think of TianHuar again
During my study period
I can make use of revising to stop my mind from think of him
But when comes to holiday
I don knw wht to do!
Ytd when I see "Boys Over Flowers"
EP 14
My mind suddenly flash to TianHuar
Den my tears suddenly drop down
I jus miss him
But wht can I do???
Nothing!!!???
I try to forget him...But I don knw how?
Even now there are still a lot of qns in my mind
I don knw how to ans
Example>:
Why I like him until I can't control myself?
Tht the thing!
I remember doreen ask mi tis qns
Why I like him a lot...even I with him I also might suffering
And my ans to tis is "I don knw"
I knw tht I should give out on him le
Not coz he don like mi or etc....
But I got 自知之明
I knw tht not a single prince will come for mi
My mum told my aunt tht
she worry tht I will not find a good guy to get marry
when I grow older and older
I told myelf and my aunt tht I want to be 女强人
Coz I don want anyone to have the chane to hurt mi
and become 女强人 is my goal for now

Now the hurt in my heart is
自作之受
Coz everyone told mi to give out long ago
But is I myself can't give him out even he got girlfriend
and
if at first I nv promise JunHui to go Chris there to work
I will not knw Doreen and Michelle Ng
and even I will not get to know TianHuar through Doreen
I jus don want to hear "doreen"
Coz I will surly throw tamper tht I can't even control myself
;<

♥our day is full of surprise

1:28:00 PM

Sunday, June 21, 2009

Today still not recover yet
In fact my body become weaker and weaker
I also don knw why
Anyway one thing tht
make mi very angry was MICHELLE NG!!!
Thanks to her for giving mi the courage to sae the thing below

First
I must sae is tht
Michelle and Chynna give mi the feeling tht they came from the same world
Both nv spare a thought for others
Both are selfish tht only think of themselves
Michelle...
don try to using mi to get some info abt Gracia
It will not work!!!!
U are so selfish tht I sick an tired of u!!!
Pls do spare a thought for others as well
If u are the one tht ur frezs are using u...I bet u also feel angry and hurt
So pls put ur thought in others people shoes as well
Let mi flash back...
I think this is not the first time tht u using mi rite??
Let mi list down:
1.At cityhall...remeb tht time we go sing K when out in the field
U told us tht if u nv reach 10pieces...Chris will break up with u
I think tis is the first time
2. At Thomas plaza...
u told mi tht if u nv ring bell Chris will break-up with u
told mi to help u to bell
I think tis is the 2nd time ba...
So not need to list down all...
and
all the excuses tht u use is "Chris will break up with u"
Come on la...if u keep on using ppl jus to reach ur target
Den I can sae is u will end-up losing all ur frezs
If u really end-up in tis
I can sae is 报应....
And
also
next thing tht u will do is spamming people blog
So u if really does these things again
Den there is a place suit u
tht is "LOW CLASS"
Such a smart gal like u end up in these category at the same time
really pity u
These show mi tht u a 3yr old kid!
It is true tht my frezs are lesser than u
but at least they treat mi with a sincere heart
and
these types of ppls are called
"TRUE FRIENDS"
Do u have it???
I bet u don have ba!
SUCH A PITY GAL!!!!

♥our day is full of surprise

11:47:00 AM

Saturday, June 20, 2009

Today feeling very 痛苦
Fall sick for 2 days
Doctor sae I eat sth wrong
tht why I suffering from stomachache etc....
Hai
But I was very happy
coz my mum nv scold mi when I was sick
and my aunt came to my cousin's room
jus to check I was running a fever
All these things had not happen since I was sec4
But most importantly
is tht I wish my granny and my grandpa were by my site
But I knw it will not happen again
I remember when I was young
my granny use to buy a lot of dolls for mi to cheer mi up
when I was sick
and
my grandpa will give mi sweet jus to see mi smile
when I was sick
How I wish there is a time mchine!!!?

♥our day is full of surprise

7:37:00 PM

Thursday, June 18, 2009

Today feel like blogging
Yvonne and Selene went Topone K-ING
My cousin,AJ, also went TopOne for K-ING as well
Hai
Only I myself at hm
Coz of one reason
MY AUNT DON LET MI GO!
How I wish my aunt will like their parent
can let mi go anyway tht I want
If keep on like tis...
how on earth tht I can make new frezs!!!
How am I going to spend my day today at hm???
Doing K-ING as well in my room with HI-5 set???
Reading "Breaking Drawn"???
I also don knw
I jus love K-iNG a lot@!!!!!!!!!!!!
Anyway gals and AJ enjoy urself!!!!!!
I HATE TODAY!!!!!!
;(

♥our day is full of surprise

12:33:00 PM

Wednesday, June 17, 2009

Ytd meet my group of gals
at KFC
I though is only libing...Selene and Yvonne only
But I nv though tht
Chynna also join us
So forget it le
While waiting for Selene to come
Sth had happen and
make mi feel very angry!
All I want to sae
is don think I and Yvonne
take private means no future
Some ppl also take private also can found a gd job
OK!!!
So what u studying in NP!!!!
U also must knw when U are
sad or find ppl to talk
Is Yvonne who be ur listening ear
不要忘恩负义!!!
So try to show off in front of us!!!
Pls la...think first before u talk
And
next time if u want to scold mi
talk to mi directly lor...don backstep a person
We show respect to u
But PLS SHOW RESPECT TO US!!!!!!!!!
Don try to do anything funny to hurt us
For ytd
is I give u face
so I nv scold u directly in public
But next time
if u do tis again...I will surly scold u in public
I sae it means I do it
If u think I don dare to do tis
Den u give it a try!!!
If u sae I using u to try tamper
I also don might!!!
Coz I knw myself well den u does!!!!!!!!!!!!

♥our day is full of surprise

12:48:00 PM

Tuesday, June 16, 2009

Today jus feel like blogging maybe coz of ytd things ba!
First Yvonne and Selene keep on calling mi
But I don pick up coz my mind was so confuse
tht I don knw how to ans their qns if they as mi anything
Sorry gal!I knw u gals are worry abt mi
but I jus want to let my mind claim down first
before I think of anything else
Nex when I sleeping
I eventually had a dream
I dream tht I was having a tea break with my granny
Which I was happy to see tht
We had a lot of talk
But at the same time she also worry abt mi
she told mi tht
I alr grow up le...must knw how to handle things well
and
my aunt actually care abt us
coz she don want anything happen to mi
tht way she rather keep mi at hm
But I told my granny
tht I knw my aunt care abt mi but I alr 18
she cant always keep mi at hm
Den she told mi
tht every mother has their reason
to keep their children at hm
is jus my aunt don want to sae
and
my aunt will knw tht if anything happen to her
I also will worry abt her de

Maybe what my granny had sae
is rite
Every mother has the reason
is jus I don knw
coz I nv be a mother before
But before my granny go
she actually sae sorry to mi
for not saying gd bye to mi before she leave mi
I ask her
why she suddenly leave mi
she told mi tht
her time is up and she bear to leave us
She told mi to let go of all the unhappy memories
But before I going to tell her tht
"if I let go of all the unhappy memories
den I will still left the the unhappy memories
coz my unhappy memories are don days and years
tht I had spend with her!!!!

♥our day is full of surprise

12:28:00 PM

Monday, June 15, 2009

Today whole day quarrel with my aunt
I jus don knw why she always keep mi at hm
Ytd night
Yvonne msg mi
ask mi whether thurs want go K-ING again with her poly frezs
I was so happy to hear tht
Coz tis is the chance to
make new friends
and
also let mi feel very relax
To mi K-ING is part of my life coz
I can sing song to make mi feel relax
and stop mi from thinking of TianHuar
So aft tht I msg my aunt to ask her
but her ans is "NO"
Which is not the ans I want!!!!!!!!!!

So I try my luck
By asking her again
But we end up quarreling
and
crying for mi
Other den crying I really don knw wht I can do
She ever threaten mi tht
if I want to go K-ING
my clothes will end-up at my mum's hus
Den how can I choose???

My friends alr so little le
and
yet she don let mi go out to make frezs!

Does she knw why I keep on going for K-ING
I bet she don knw!!!!
Going K-ing will stop mi thinking those unpleasant things
and
will make mi feel relax!
Does she knw why like to watch Taiwan Idol drama?
I thinks she also don knw!
I can say it here!
Coz I really envy those scene and things happen in those dramas
Coz those scene will happy in fairy-tale but not real whole!
The ending will always have
a prince save the princess!
I jus hope tht I will be the princess
but at the same time I knw I will not have a prince to save mi!
I jus hope tht I will be the 女主角 in
both 败犬女王&敲敲爱上你
Coz both of them will so strong in their charater
But I like the 女主角 in 敲敲爱上你
I really hope tht I will like them
as they willl depend on themselve but nv relay at others

Sometimes I reall feel very USELESS!!
Coz I can't ever fight for my freedom!!!
Can't solve the problems myself!!!
And
always scared of this scared of tht!!!!
Why I so useless???

♥our day is full of surprise

7:37:00 PM

Friday, June 12, 2009

Today went to TopOne
which is located at Bugis
for K-ING...
Wow!!!
Really long time nv go K-ING le
My group of gals and I
really have a lot of fun today
We sang for 7hours !!!
Really enjoy for today
AFT WHICH
Home sweet Home!!!

♥our day is full of surprise

7:47:00 PM

Tuesday, June 9, 2009

Today mit my group of gals
at Fuchun CC
We will having a lot of fun
First we will K-ing
use yvonne's laptop
Aft which Chynna came and join us
So Yvonne and Libing went to collect birthday cake
Coz we will have give Chynna a surprise
tht is
to celebrate her belated birthday
Haha!!!
I bet Chynna surly love it de!
Den we had taken a lot of photos!
Hee!
;)

♥our day is full of surprise

5:57:00 PM

Saturday, June 6, 2009

Today is my very best frez/sis
18th Birthday
So I wish my frez,Yvonne
"Happy Birthday"

We had be friends for 12 yrs
And in tis 12yrs
We went through a lot of things
We quarrel...having fun and enjoy every single day tht we are together

But I only can celebrate her birthday for only 2 yrs
within the 12 yrs
Tis yr celebration I also can't celebrate
due to some reasons
Hai
I also very upset abt it

I sincerely hope tht she will enjoy her
18th birthday celebration ytd
And
Sorry for not joining u gals for the celebration

♥our day is full of surprise

12:54:00 PM

Friday, June 5, 2009

Blogging again!!!;)
Today is Doreen's Birthday
So I wish her
"Happy Birthday"

Actually I really don knw wht to sae
Many things had happened between us
So we end-up like tis

But the truth is
we really had a lot of
happy memories most of the time
when we are together
I and her knw each other
for
1yr 3months
And tis 1yr 3months we really enjoy it
I don knw she will feel tis way or not
But tis is my feeling

It's also true that I had forgive her le
Coz I really think a lot
If ling can forgive mi
den why I can't forgive doreen?
It's nothing from what doreen did to mi
when compare to what I did to ling!
So I decided to do tis!

Although I had msg her personally
to wish her happy birthday
But I will still written it on my blog
coz tis is the way I show my sincere
and
the happy memories tht I remember

I really don knw my frez will sae mi silly
or not?
But I really can't hate her
Coz hating a person is very miserable
and
I rather use my energy to spend on my study!

Anyway I really feel tht I very useless
Coz I can told my frez tht I forget all the sad memories
But I myself still cant do it
Cant walk out the sad memories
tht I had before turning 14!

♥our day is full of surprise

12:27:00 PM

Thursday, June 4, 2009

Today is my grandpa's died anniversary
I always remember why had happened 4yrs ago
All the things seem to be very fresh in my mind I bet not a single one will knw my feeling for today The feeling and the nightmare tht I always can't walk out!! People always keep telling mi tht my grandpa passed away is coz of his illness is not my fault But mi myself don think so Coz if I hve notice there's a pool of water on the floor I will not fall and hit my grandpa le So is I'm the one who oz my grandpa to passed away de
I really miss my grandpa a lot
A lot tht many of them can't imagine
The time tht I always fight food with my grandpa
...
the time tht he spent time with mi
and
dote mi when I was young
...
the time that we spent at the beach chatting wit each other
...
the time when he was with mi when I was moody and sad
All these things I can't forget in my mind for all these yrs

But now I think all the things will not happen again
all my grandparent had already passed away within half a yr
I remember when I was young
my grandpa told mi
if one day I can't find him
I can talk to the bear tht he he give mi
den he will appear beside mi
BUT WHEN NOW I TALK TO THE BEAR
I STILL CAN'T SEE HE WAS BESIDE MI

I REALLY MISS HIM A LOT
In the past
I have my friends to accompany mi so tht I will not think all these thing
But now
I was all alone coz my aunt don let mi go out!!!!!
I had alr spent the whole night crying ytd at my bed
and I don wish these thing will happen tonight again
Wht should I do???
What I can do to make myself to look strongest???

♥our day is full of surprise

1:03:00 PM